Trainer for Hire
by Raxychaz
Summary: Out to win a bet on a matter of pride, and for a spot of fun, Menma Uzumaki sets off to basically point out a lot of stupid shit while his lovely partner draws stares in every town.
1. Chapter 1

Menma Uzumaki was a man who enjoyed wandering, he enjoyed seeing new places, observing new environments and the creatures held within. Creatures such as the current beast he sat upon, Gyarados. A giant serpentine creature, scales shimmering bloody red a great contrast to the waters it waded through. It was capable of unleashing great tidal waves, beams of energy that could tear apart a small army, and devouring most of its smaller fish-like kin in a single swoop.

Unlike some people he didn't bother naming most of his collection. A few here and there, but most of them were just big tough sonsabitches that liked to fight, didn't care for names.

He'd dressed appropriately for rushing across the ocean, with Gyarados pulling him along he currently sat on an inflatable raft, only wearing a pair of swimming trunks, lathered in sunscreen and bearing a pair of shades over his closed eyes.

He liked to travel, but he also liked to do it in style.

His skin was slightly tanned from being out so much but he was naturally pale so there was only so much he could do, he had long, spiky black hair that was currently training in the water behind his raft, like an abyssal tail of spikes

Menma did love his hair, and a good drenching in salt water made washing it all the more cathartic.

Laying across his lap was a Gardevoir, a humanoid looking Pokemon with, unusually, black accents in place of the usual green. She still had the usual alabaster white skin of all Gardevoir's but her dress was off, in place of it was a black bikini, had to be custom made to conform to the red protrusion on her chest. There were multiple reasons Menma loved 'shiny' Pokemon, for Gardevoir it was her hefty chest and round ass.

Genetic Mutations were fucking rad.

Her 'hair' was a little longer as well, not by much but it was worth noting, her limbs were slight and fae light, it fit the whole 'Fairy' thing. Her name was Collete, and she wasn't used for fighting like most Pokemon, she was a 'traveling companion'. Due to her being a Psychic type her intellect was on par with most humans, the intelligent ones at least, and she used this intelligence to shack up with the traveler and bump uglies at any given moment, though with the whole 'Pokephillia' stigma they kept it to themselves...

Most of the time.

That's another story though.

Anyway, Collette had been with him since she was a Ralts, and ever since day one he knew she was special, aside from the obvious.

"I can't wait to get to Kanto and watch those bumpkins in Kanto flip their tits over seeing us together." That was it, she could speak properly. Almost every Pokemon had the capability, but it was the ability itself that made her different.

"It will be quite the sight I'm sure." He answered distantly, he had a bet to win, but didn't really hold a vested interest, aside from pride. And money.

"Thinking about Cynthia?" Asked Collette, tapping his cheek with her foot, he grabbed her ankle and kissed her shin before setting it back onto his lap. "You sweet thing you."

"I was thinking of the bet, yes." Menma answered, his arms moving to pick up the slim female and putting her back onto his chest, his arms wrapping around to rest on her flat stomach. Another mutation he was happy about, the 'protrusion' on her chest didn't come out the back, instead a red heart shaped mark on her spine in its place. "I find it stupid she's so hung up on me becoming 'official'. Then again I can't blame her, her challengers seem to be drooling morons."

Cynthia, the current Champion of Sinnoh, he'd met during his travels they'd shared a few drinks and a few stories and it ended up with her challenging him to a bet, a simple one for someone with a functioning brain. Go through Kanto, collecting all Badges and take the place of the New Champion.

If he won, she'd fork over a large sum of cash, along with a few rarer Pokemon from Sinnoh that he hadn't bothered to search out, and if he lost he'd do the same but with creatures from all over Server. Really he felt like it was as suckers bet but then again, like he previously said, he had a functioning brain.

The only problem would be registering under Khanto's laws, they were a little... Lacking in innovation when it came to the other continents. The biggest concern was the possible charges of Pokephilia, usually he could just explain that Collette had her own sense of free will, a few demonstrations later along with a conversation with the lady in question and people backed off. Khanto was infamous for still employing most of the 'Jenny' family as their standard law enforcement. Great cannon fodder and position fillers, but not the brightest bloodline in the world.

So that was the danger that came with his relationship with Collette and the only real threat to the bet. Which is probably why Cynthia chose Khanto in the first place. Which sucked because he liked Jhoto more.

Gyarados chimed at him, Menma perceived it as a 'We're almost there'. Some might just hear 'GYAROOOO!' But they were ignorant plebeians.

Pallet Town, residence of Professor Samuel Oak, known around the world as a good man, a good scientist and a terrible poet. Even at the age of 20 Menma had yet to actually meet the man, which he found a novel idea considering he'd been traveling for a decade now and had a habit of meeting people of some credibility.

He even had tea with Professor Rowan in Sinnoh. Lovely chap.

Anyway, with Gyarados' announcement, Collette turned over and pouted up at him, lifting his sunglasses molten gold locked with sky blue, "Kisses before we meet new people?" She asked, she would have pressed more but it was unneeded as his tongue was already down her throat, a muffled giggle escaped her as the pair had a quick, power pash before they got into sight of the town.

Rolling off him and whiping the saliva off her lips Collette had another giggle escape her, she was pleased at least. Menma dug into the waterproof slip he kept his belongings in and opened it enough to pull out a ball, and his jacket, Collete sighed and did the same on her side, pulling out a small necklace was a shrunken ball on it, "It'll only be for a little while." Menma promised to her amusement.

"I know, I'm just not a fan of stasis." She muttered with a shake of the head, he'd asked her what it was like in there, apparently like forced sleep, but they came out of it alert as ever. Like blinking but for a long time.

Menma enlarged the ball on the chain and tapped her head with it, she was swallowed up with a red flash of light, shrinking the red and white orb down once more he slipped the necklace on, Gyarados came up to a small alcove near the town, it was within sight and all, a small town. Nothing special, but humble beginnings tended to make legends. So the stories went.

Gyarados pushed the raft onto the beach and swam back a little until his master got his feet settled, "Alright, bud. I'll let you know when I need you, have a good sleep." Menma said with a nod of the beasts efforts, Gyarados roared a farewell and was sucked up into a ball. Menma tucked the Dive Ball into his jackets pocket before sifting through all the stuff in the raft, pulling out his bag and retrieving yet another Dive Ball. Opening it revealed a Feraligatr, a bipedal, light blue reptile with red spikes down its back and bulky build.

"Mind dousing me?" He asked, setting his belongings aside, Feraligatr nodded and waited for his master to step away from his clothing, releasing a low powered stream of water the beast cleaned off all the salt sticking to his Master's skin, Menma shook out his hair like a dog and slapped his cheeks to rouse the heat back into his body. With a nod to him the big reptile accepted the return with ease.

He sat around for a bit to drip dry and allowed the air to dry him off, Menma slowly put his usual clothing back on as his raft deflated.

A white dress shirt under a navy blue double breasted coat, black slacks and boots. Nothing too fancy but it was comfortable to walk around in, rolling up the raft he slid it into it's case and put that into his bag, before setting off, adjusting the strap as needed.

 **Pallet Town**

In the sleepy town of Pallet roused all its inhabitants, as they were bidding farewell to a pair of boys. One was a young man with a cocky smirk and an air of superiority, light brown hair and a purple, loose top. Gary 'Motherfucking' Oak.

Don't ask about the nickname he was 10 and didn't earn it in the way you think.

The other boy was Ash Ketchum, the cringe is acknowledged. Lots of blue, a black shirt under a blue vest, blue pants and shoes. A hat with a red symbol on the centre and coal black, spiky hair. Along with strange zig-zags on his cheeks.

They were having some form of banter and exchanging words, blah blah. One who could be the Professor was behind. Old man, lab coat, wise look on his face. Pretty much the qualifying points. Aside from a few choice exceptions.

Young woman, charming, intelligent. Professor Juniper, lovely woman.

Getting off track. Anyway, Menma approached as the boys left, one in a car of all things and the other on foot, a Pikachu unwillingly walking off with him.

Menma approached and was immediately recognized, "Ah! Mr. Uzumaki, Champion Cynthia told me to expect you, a pleasure. I am Samuel Oak." Greeted the old man, Menma smiled and inwardly shook his head at the idea of Cyn helping him win the bet. The cunning woman probably had a few pitfalls planned.

"A pleasure to meet you, Professor." Menma said with a nod, his hair bobbing slightly as his head moved, "Can I take a moment of your time? To get myself registered and such?" Oak was more than happy to do so, ushering the wanderer into his lab.

"Alright, firstly how many Pokemon do you currently posses?" Asked Oak, Menma sifted through his bag for a moment.

"Quite a few dozen." Answered the man with a chuckle.

 **Later**

It took a while but everything got sorted out. Menma idly noted the reaction to the sheer amount of Pokemon he kept on his person, unlike most he didn't subscribe to the whole 'Keep only 6' philosophy. That only hindered his journeys, so he didn't bother with it.

He set up near a tree and let Collette out, still in her Bikini, she fetched her clothes. Slipping into a black v-neck and using her 'natural' dress as a skirt, or more of a sarong but whatever. Natural in the sense that it evolved with her but it still didn't change the fact it was just an article of clothing. Collette didn't wear shoes for obvious reasons so she was up and ready to go in a few minutes.

"All set?" He asked, she was fiddling with her piercings, Edge Lord here watch out, a pair in her bottom lip and one in her tongue.

"Yeeup." She said finally, fiddling with the one in her tongue for a moment before standing up, and taking his arm as the walked. "So how'd it go?" Collette asked curiously.

"Well enough, Samuel gushed a bit over a few of the crew, he didn't seem to notice you on my neck." Informed the trainer with a shrug at her curious gaze, "I guess he got caught up with Gyarados and Tyranitar."

"They always get attention." She got all huffy until his leant into her a little bit, "Well when you put it _that_ way." She snickered at his grin and wiggling brows. "Deviant."

"Says you." He shot back.

"Says everyone who catches us." She didn't even miss a beat, this got a chuckle out of him.

"They always look so surprised." And so the tangent of the sexcapades began, they began giggling like fools over the memories of people catching them in the act, there was always the even with the hot wax and the bondage straps...

Good times.

Before long they realized they'd wandered quite far, Pidgey and Spearow fluttering in a nearby field, he already had a Pidgeot and Fearow was fugly as all hell, so he ignored them. A few Rattata dashing across the path and deeper into the woods.

"Their thoughts are always so scattered." Collette observed, wild Pokemon thought about the world, and saw it, in such a different way to domesticated ones like her. While she was able to be coherent and had her own free will and such, these creatures were little more than just animals.

It was a very odd position to be in, caught in between two sides of the same world. Most people saw her as an animal, a beautiful one to be sure but still, and most Pokemon saw her as a humans pet.

"They themselves are scattered. Wild animals usually are." Answered Menma. Only to hear the rantings of a small animal, with a risen brow they came around a bend to see the boy from earlier, and his Pikachu, the small mouse sitting in the tree taunting its trainer.

"Come on Pikachu this is just silly!" Snapped the boy, Menma and Collette stood there for a moment, looking between the boy and his grumpy pet, only to keep walking. Apparently the little yellow creature took their brushing him off as an affront and tried to shock the pair with a Thundershock, only for a psychic Reflect to appear and reduce the ability to dull sparks.

"Pikachu you can't just attack people! I'm so sorry!" Quickly apologized the boy.

Menma turned over his shoulder, Collette casting a dagger filled look at the smug little mouse, "That's fine... Though I'd discipline that little rat of yours. If something like this happens again, I doubt the next person will be so forgiving." With that icy threat directed at the mouse hanging Menma and his Gardevoir continued on their way, Ash felt a chill go down his spine at those powerful golden eyes, the guy just looked _through_ him.

It made his skin crawl to be sure.

Menma idly rolled another ball in his other hand, considering just flying from Gym to Gym to speed this whole thing up. But that was until he saw a balloon in the air, heading towards Viridian City, he frowned, how tacky a Meowth head?

"They're Team Rocket." Said Collette.

"I sometimes forget just how far your abilities can reach." Replied Menma with a small smile replacing the frown, she huffed again and nudged him.

"Mind reading and defense is about the best you're getting outta me and you know it big guy."

"S'ok. I've got a bunch of creatures that can level cities in my bag right now, I can handle having my lover be able to read minds and stop us both from getting vaporized at the drop of a hat." He replied, taking his arm out of her grasp and wrapping it around her shoulders, kissing the top of her head.

"I try to avoid thinking about _who_ you have in that bag... Or the fact that a viable career path is allowing 10 year olds to gain said creatures of mass destruction. Good thing War seems to be a foreign concept."

"For now."

"Tomorrow always brings such wonderful things so yes, for now."

 **Viridian City**

Menma flew in on Pidgeot, the big fluffy bird happy to stretch its wings for a change, the lovely creature was even more elated when he said she could have some time out as a reward for being so good, she immediately took off towards the forest in search of Caterpie to devour.

The glutton.

Menma was essentially doing a stake out to see what would happen with the apparent criminal organization coming into the picture. Menma had a narrow gaze fixed onto the sky as he and Collette got some coffee, she happily enjoyed a doughnut while he bit into a chocolate bar, she tapped his shin with her slim leg, getting his attention, she nudged her head over to an approaching Officer Jenny.

"Morning-Wait no, good afternoon Officer." He greeted, looking at his phone and spotting the fact that it was 1:28 PM.

"Is this Pokemon registered to you?" She asked bluntly, Menma's brain skipped for a second at the ham fisted attempt at a shakedown.

"Yes..." Menma began slowly, "Is that all?"

"Care to explain why it has piercings and is dressed that way?" She pressed further.

"Because she wanted to be, is this going somewhere?" He asked once more only for her to shoot him a look of loathing.

"Trainers like you disgust me, forcing your Pokemon to play to your little fantasies." She snarled, Menma took a breath to calm himself, he usually avoided getting worked up but somehow blunt and stupid pressed his buttons.

"Officer I'm quite capable of answering your questions, not that I appreciate the way you're speaking to my trainer." Collette, the angel that she is, cut in with an icy tone.

"You can talk!?" How many times had they heard that?

"Yes, now be a good girl and go away before I break your mind." A rainbow of colours flashed in Collette's eyes as she confused Jenny to the point where she just waddled back over to her bike and fell over it, unconscious.

Collette let out a low sigh as she rubbed the side of her head, Menma leant over to her and placed his hand over hers, easily dwarfing the size of her slight digits. "Need some meds?" He offered, this is why she didn't battle, she got migraines when using her powers for more than making a few basic tricks. One of the major downsides to having a mutated genetic code, some things just didn't work.

"No, no it's fine. But thank you." She kissed his hand and gently pushed it off, instead moving her chair slightly so she could rest her head on his shoulder, "But just let me rest my delicate self on you."

"Tsk, so needy." He mock sighed but smiled, he did love the way she picked up his flair for the dramatic when they were younger.

When the balloon came into view it also seem to be just in front of a storm of some kind large bolts of electricity, oh wait no that might just be the thunder rat. Either way, he had to book a room for himself and Collette for tonight, he'd keep someone on watch in case shit went down.

 **Lemme know whatcha think. :)**

 _ **Raxychaz!**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Wonderful to see the sea of reviews, do enjoy keep it up ;).**

 **Guisniperman: He'll capture a few and** _ **make**_ **them badasses I can't really say what at the moment because reasons, and yes at this moment Collette is the only one he's with, that may change in the future but for now she's the one.**

 **Extreme-unDEAD: For now, but the future holds mysteries, ooooooh spoooky.**

 **The DarkEnd Dragon: Not to be tangential, but isn't it funny how those three seem to be the most popular Pokemon to bone? A skinny psychic, a rabbit, and a fire chicken. I just find it funny. I'm with everyone on it, but still it tickles my fancy. The answer to your question is above though.**

 **Shadow Of God: Yeah, not that I don't enjoy it, but writing every iteration of his character as a lunatic that bathes in the blood of his enemies is a little grating, I need variation. Plus that attitude doesn't really fit the world so it's a double-whammy of goodness.**

 **Br2nd66: I can agree with you on that, especially the Naruto/Pokemon crossover section. I'm not going for gritty darkness but a little realism will be enough to make some people draw back I'm sure.**

 **ImWiredSoWhat: Yeah, the Dark Souls story has the problem of being started so long ago, and as I got better at writing the difference in quality was obvious. The Dragon Age one is a good bit of fun, I thought I offended people's sensibilities when I only got 2 reviews on chapter 3 XD.**

 **To everyone else I'd like to give a fuzzy little thank you, you lovely cherubs you.**

 **Start.**

The flushed look from Nurse Joy always amused him, seeing the trainer and the Pokemon walking off arm in arm, and then waking up the next day to the sound of a shakedown. Menma and Collette poked their heads around to see a pair of people sporting a white version of the Team Rocket uniform, one was a man with short blue hair and dark blue eyes, the other was a woman, a good looking one admittedly, with _long_ red hair, like is she had a snake strapped to her head and coloured it red. She also had teal coloured eyes.

But unfortunately they were trying to rob the centre, and by proxy, him. And that just didn't fly. So he strode out, hands in his pockets, Collette sitting this one out as she'd seen this exact scenario a few times and would rather just not be involved.

"Oh look James, this strapping young man has decided to just surrender. Good on you." Praised the woman with a smug smirk on her red painted lips, Menma inwardly sighed before pulling out a gun.

Yep, a fucking gun.

He leveled the weapon at the woman's throat, the man turned ashen and the Meowth rapidly backed off. The woman choked out her shock and fear coloured her eyes, "How about you three get on your way and I don't colour the wall with you?" He offered lightly, despite the look on his face. She rasped in shock as he continued on. "This is a rather standard 44. Magnum revolver, nothing custom about it besides the etchings on the side, can you see them? The scratches? They're for each person who stood in my way, and was torn down. Do you want to join them? No? Then LEAVE!" He roared, cocking the hammer back.

"You-You-You!"

"T-t-t-today junior!" Snapped the trainer with a snarl making the pair of criminals hug one another and run out the door in terror, the Meowth demanding they wait up. Spinning the gun on his finger he slid it back into his jacket, the Nurse visibly relaxed, "We all good?" He asked, around, "Oh look the boy." He said noticing the mouse and his boy. Menma walked back into his room, as sirens began to sound off, "Late as usual." He grabbed his belongings, and jumped out of the window, he and Collette were met with Pidgeot, picking them up and carrying them off into the forest.

He'd rather not deal with the fools of a degenerate lineage. Anyway, he and Collette began walking again, Menma returned Pidgeot and once more walked arm in arm with his lovely partner.

 **Viridian Forest.**

The forest was lush, and full of life. Bugs about in droves, Menma and Collette were being observed by hundreds of eyes with each step, and finally they were set upon by a human bearing one such pair of eyes, a boy dressed as a samurai for some reason. "You, I will challenge!" He said before throwing out a ball and revealing a Pinsir, a large bug with a brown shell, a vertical mouth filled with independently moving 'teeth', a pair of horns upon its head with barbs surrounding them.

Menma blinked for a moment before shrugging and producing a ball, this was a Dusk Ball, green with a black web pattern on it, he tossed it onto the field with a shake of his head, this revealed, a four winged bat, dark purple in colour with blue eyes and small pointed ears. This was a Crobat.

The boy blinked until he saw his little pet bug fall over frothing at the mouth, its face filled with black pins, each pin popped with a purple noxious gas. "Poison Sting, or I suppose Poison Barrage is more accurate, is devastating if one is willing to train long enough." Crobat fluttered its way onto his shoulder, using it smaller wings as legs and sitting happily with its master.

The boy fell on his ass in shock as the now trio left him in their wake. Crobat was an old companion, one of his first, as Zubat's were so easy to come across. It took a lot of TLC to get a Crobat, as Zubat's were usually pathetically weak, but patience and care allowed him to get quite the powerful little spitfire as his lifelong ally.

Crobat's evolved through trust, unwavering loyalty and love.

Other interesting things happening, nothing. The rest of the walk was rather calm. And quiet, just as he liked, there was less banter than usual but still a silent pleasant trip never went ill received.

They came upon the exit and were set upon by a rather grumpy looking Nidoran Male, a small quadruped with purple skin, a few blotches on its flank, and a cluster of poisonous horns adorning its forehead, adorable big ears on the sides of its head. Menma paused for a moment, he didn't have a Nidoking, and Nidorans were quite easy to raise from what he heard.

"Oh... cool." He mumbled for a moment, nudging Crobat up, the creature fluttered into the air and struck the smaller creature with more Poison Stings, he didn't want to kill the poor thing, and this was Crobat's weakest attack, it helped Nidoran was also a Poison Type.

The creature rolled onto its side, its hind leg twitching, Menma produced a shrunken Poke Ball before tossing it, and snaring the creature within, given how critically wounded it was it was a simple catch and grab. He caught the ball that sought out the tracker on his wrist, that's how they leapt back into peoples hands for future reference.

He pulled the dazed creature out of its new home and administered several hits of Potion. Washing the wounds with Spring Water.

The creature roused after a few minutes of rest and looked up at him curiously, "Yes, I caught you. I'm sure you have some reservations about this but I'll be honest, your opinion on the matter is moot." Nidoran's ears fell flat at the blatant manner of his new master, Menma pat the creatures back, "C'mon, I'll drag you to glory." He said, Crobat being returned as Nidoran followed after him, Collette taking his arm once more.

 **Later, Just Outside Pewter**

"Alright, Poison Barrage on the Pidgey." Ordered Menma, as his new pet tore into its opponent with vicious aptitude, a plethora of purple pins shot from the back of the small Poison Type and turned a flock of Pidgey into a sack of rotten meat in a few moments. "Fuckers were making too much noise." He looked on as Nidoran began feasting on his kills, Menma shrugged and let the creature be, most Pokemon were Omnivores, but some people were so against the idea of them being the natural beasts they were that they kept them on supplements and Berries, this is why his were stronger. They kept their killers instinct, they kept their predators pride.

Also it just made them generally more vicious so that was a great side effect.

Upside though, now he could bond with the little King over fried chicken. 'Chicken' was the name given to creatures bred with no combat ability whatsoever and instead were just used for eating. They were glorious deep fried and drizzled with honey.

"Shit now I've got cravings." Menma wiped a little drool from his lip at the thought, it had been a while since he had a good feed on take-away.

"You're such a woman." Chimed Collette from her spot, leaning against a tree and fiddling with his new Pokedex, he didn't really bother with it, information was easier to access on the Nav-Net. Tangents aside Nidoran came back over licking his chops happily, "I'll put out the bait and we'll wait for the next wave of survival of the fittest." Said Menma, opening a disk shaped, heavily scented, pill. It was bait, it made finding Pokemon immensely easier, it also helped training in the harsher environments, because it allowed most of his team to stick to their guns in the hardest fight, and still come out on top.

Admittedly Mt. Silver was a total fucking chore though, he would never deny that.

Nidoran nodded and just scratched behind its ear, Menma scanned the little fella, plucking the 'Dex from Collette for a moment much to her chagrin. Double Kick, Poison Barrage, Tackle and Tail Whip. Nothing special but that fighting move would come in handy for the Rock Gym. If nothing else it would prove his point that type advantage was all you needed. And planning ahead guaranteed a win.

This is why public schools needed to be more inclusive about this kind of stuff, like just tack on a 'Pokemon Studies' course and the level of general trainer intelligence would skyrocket by the next generation.

This time it was Spearow mixed in with the Pidgey, "Only use Double Kick, if you get hit, sprout barbs on your hide and get that Poison Point working for you, kiddo." Ordered Menma, Nidoran nodded and stalked his way into the grass, stealthy as he could.

The Spearow were getting all bitchy with the Pidgey so they were distracted until a large purple form shot out of the thicket, a glowing foot struck one Spearow reducing its head to mush, then the little Nido' spun in the air, using the corpse to direct himself, and released a few barbs from his hide, making sure his prey couldn't go anywhere.

Menma was happy all it took was a few scenarios to get Nidoran thinking for himself, when he finished eating he plopped back on Menma left and began glowing, "Well that was a productive afternoon I'd say." What emerged was a Nidorino, a much more intimidating version of the previously pudgy purple fella, his legs gained more muscle and his ears lengthened and sharpened, his horn grew some, over all he got bigger and tougher looking.

"How long was that, a few hours?" Asked Collette curiously.

"I guess they really are easy to raise, good for you Nidorino. Come on we'll let you rest up and we'll hit the Gym tomorrow." The creature nodded and plodded after its master, until said master produced its ball and it was allowed to sleep in stasis. Menma pat the ball before shrinking it down and sliding it back into his bag, walking hand in hand with his lover.

"A productive afternoon I'd say." Commented the Gardevoir as they entered the city and made a B-line for the nearest fast-food restaurant.

"Oh definitely, I'm pleased that he grew so quickly. Then again I suppose he was already close to maturity. So many factors not enough effort to give a shit." Menma sighed in mock distress, but strode into the rather quiet KFC with purpose, and that purpose was gluttony.

 **Pokemon Centre, Later That Night**

Menma lay on his side, the smaller form of his love against his, both were only in their smallclothes and just on the precipice of sleep, "Hey... Col." Whispered Menma, his voice rough from the few minutes of complete silence.

"Hmm?"

"I love you." He kissed her head and placed his head back onto the pillow, content. She allowed a small laugh to leave her before she drifted off, her smaller fingers intertwining with his, a silent gesture of 'And I you'.

As the pair slept they were observed, a small camera in the room, all the rooms had them to observe the facility, to make sure nothing untoward happened. Joy almost fluttered out of her seat, hearts in her eyes as she sighed dreamily.

"Oh my, it's so beautiful."

Her moment of cuteness induced delirium was interrupted by a boy, and a Girl was that Misty from the Cerulean City Gym? Why was-no wait that didn't matter, job first curiosity later. "Hello, how can I help you?" She chirped sweetly.

"Oh hi Nurse Joy, would it be Okay if we got a room tonight?" Asked Misty, at Joy's risen brow and eyes glancing to the boy the orangette immediately amended the statement, "Separate, rooms."

"Is he alright?" Whispered Joy, seeing the young man's pale look.

"We found a... lot of blood in field, along with Pokemon Bait, we think someone may have been poaching." Replied Misty, her eyes shifting conspiratorially.

"Oh heavens no, that was just one of our temporary residence, Mr. Uzumaki. To be honest he did the city a favour without even knowing it, the Pidgey and Spearow populations were getting a little high anyway. He was apparently training up one of his new Pokemon."

"How can someone force their Pokemon to do that!" Shouted Ash with horror.

"Well the ecosystem needs to be balanced, unfortunately most trainers don't seem to know this and without a functioning eco-system we'll have overpopulation and loss of resources where there otherwise doesn't have to be." At his baffled look she simplified, "If they're too many of one type all the others suffer."

"That doesn't make killing them any better!" Snapped Ash angrily.

"I'll have to ask you to please keep your voice down, there are many people resting and it's rude to disturb them at such an hour."

"No way! I'm going to find this guy and give him a piece of my mind, c'mon Pikachu!" Ordered the boy, a small mouse immediately following.

"Oh crap." Muttered Misty, a burly Chansey stood in the way of the boy and his pet, delivering a powerful Hypnosis, they both fell down immediately, boneless and snoring. "I'm so sorry Nurse Joy, he's still young and idealistic." Apologized the Gym Leader.

"Oh that's quite alright, I'm unfortunately used to that reaction." The pair of them held a moment of silence to hope nothing too terrible came of this incident.

 **End.**

 **You know there will be.**

 **Anyway, don't forget to review, even little things encourage me to write more. And I can see this being a good bit of fun.**

 _ **Raxychaz!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**T51B Moridin: Contrary to popular belief, the whole 10% brain power thing is just something made up for movies and fiction. I appreciate how much thought you put into that review though, that was good stuff. :)**

 **Hybrid Genesis: A little weird isn't it? Considering how some people try to make their protagonists edgy-bedgy and just forget about good ol' firearms.**

 **jjlol: No, no he will not.**

 **Guest: Oh you lovely little sausage you, much love in your direction.**

 **Extreme-UnDEAD: Who's to say he doesn't have any on him at the moment? Oh the suspense! But yes, he'll be snatching up any he comes across, that is/has been one huge failing most people fall into, 'Oh its so pretty oh look now its gone shame that'. No motherfucker chase it! But I digress, yes. The answer is yes.**

 **Shadow Of God: More than likely Pokemon only due to the way most humans would respond to such things, unless I can rationalize it in my mind further down the line.**

 **guisniperman: The Nidoking line is one of my favourites :3 I will admit they can be a little frail without decent training, sadly.**

 **(Singlet's are sleeveless shirts for those weirdo's who call them 'Wife beaters'.)**

 **Start**

Menma awoke next morning, wearing only his boxers, Collette hanging off him and went downstairs to get breakfast from the Centre's mess hall. He sat in a booth, wearing a black singlet, and dark grey shorts, only a pair of sandals on his feet, as he was still a little damp from his shower, halfway through Collette stole his towel to dry off her hair, the bitch.

She was in a dark purple v-neck and a white skirt that fell to her knees. The pair sat quietly, contently, as they enjoyed some eggs and toast for breakfast, Menma's eyes were still a little heavy and he leant into his parnter a little more than he intended.

"Come on, darling. Wakey-wakey." Instructed the Gardevoir gently, tapping his cheeks with her small hands, Menma blinked rapidly and yawned, a cup of coffee was put towards him, a Chansey in a nurse outfit offered it.

"Thank you, Chansey. You're an angel." He thanked with another yawn, the Pokemon blushed with a smile and scampered off with its tray to the next people, giggling all the way.

"You flirt." Chastised the black haired woman with a shake of her head.

"Only when I'm sleepy." Defended the bleary eyed trainer, his eyes had bags under them, he slept well but it was that kind of sleep that you get so deep, interrupting its hell. And waking up was in fact next-level hell this morning.

"You must have been exhausted when we got together." She quipped, a smirk on her lips. A grin pulled onto his, his eyes narrowings as a consequence of the wide smile, giving it a slightly deviate look.

"I certainly was afterwards." The pair broke into a pair of giggles, ending with kisses exchanged, and then more giggles.

"Ah, never change." Ordered Collette as she leant into his shoulder.

"I'll endeavor to remain charming." He promised with a chuckle, she winked and nodded.

"Good enough."

"Excuse me." Said a voice, Menma and Collette turned from their meal and conversation to see the boy and a girl, this girl had short orange hair, some of its tied to the side in a spiky ponytail, she wore a yellow top and a pair of denim shorts with red suspenders, a pair of blue and white shoes on her feet.

"Oh, hello again. Did you manage to get your pet under control?" Asked Menma with a risen brow, seeing the Pikachu on his shoulder the assumed answer was yes, but he liked goading people.

"Pikachu isn't my pet, he's my friend." Corrected Ash, Menma shrugged. "But, I forgot to introduce myself, Ash Ketchum. And this is Misty." Introduced the boy, the girl waved trying to avoid eye contact.

"Misty as in the Fourth Gym Leader of Cerulean City... bit far from home aren't you?" Asked the man with a risen brow, Misty paled slightly, Ash looked at her in confusion. "Either way, Menma Uzumaki, Collette. Pleasure." He said cordially, the Gardevoir waved disinteresdly.

"You're Mr. Uzumaki!?" Snapped Ash, like someone hit his fucking trigger.

"I am..." Responded Menma slowly, eyes narrow in suspcion.

"You _killed_ all those Pokemon!"

"Nidorino killed them all, and ate them. I just baited them into the area, it's a good way to cull a large population and get a Pokemon on the straight and narrow to growing quickly." Menma dismissed the boys words further until he seemed to get so angry and grabbed his shoulder to continue a childish rant.

Menma did not really like being touched by a lot of people, especially annoying children, so he smacked the boys wrist and jabbed him in the sternum with a pair of fingers, knocking the wind out of him and forcing him to the ground. Ash began gasping as he tried to breath, Menma picked up the empty plates and gestured it was time to go, she grabbed his bag, and slung it over her shoulder, he placed the plates at the counter for Nurse Chansey to collect, the Pokemon thanked him and waved them off. Once more, he threw an arm around the gorgeous goth he traveled with.

 **Pewter Gym**

They'd navigated around the city until they found the large building with 'Gym' on it. Creative. Entering the arena was revealed to be mostly covered in rocks and dirt, a white line of painted stone showing the limits and a small area for viewers to sit. He accepted his bag from Collette and tapped a small buzzer near the door with a sign above it, 'Push if you are here to challenge'. A low humm blared over the speakers, "I'll be right there!" Called out a youthful voice, Menma nodded and took his position, Collette standing beside him, mostly because she knew how sometimes things could go wrong, and would rather not have her love impaled on a rogue stone.

The sound of a sink went off and then a young man, tanned skin, narrow eyes and spiky brown hair came out into view. He was wiping his hands off on a towel and waved to greet them, "Hello and welcome. I'm Brock, Gym Leader of Pewter City. Are you ready for a battle?" Asked the man, he smiled easily as Menma nodded, the young man might have been a few years his junior but he was no boy in his eyes, he held himself with the strength of one who knew who they were, and what they wanted out of life. Few so young had the level of maturity if took to be introspective enough to know this.

He wore a dark green button up shirt over a black singlet, and black trousers on, along with a simple pair of black sneakers

"I am Menma Uzumaki, it's a pleasure to meet you Brock. Standard 3v3 yes?" When Brock nodded he dug into his pocket and produced a shrunken Poke Ball, tapping the centre button it expanded. Just on a side note that used to be possibly the most entertaining thing in the world to him, the novelty still hadn't really worn off that something so small could expand in size so easily, but it was far from the greatest curiosity he held. Still it was a fun little thing he found nifty.

"I'll ref, bro!" Said a smaller boy, this child looking to be Brock's sibling. He had the same facial features, and slightly shaggier hair, and obviously shorter. Brock nodded to the boy he held up a red and a green flag, "This will be the usual 3 on 3 match with no substitutions. Present when ready."

Menma tossed out his Nidorino, the beastly creature snarling lowly as it took in its surroundings, "Focus." Ordered Menma, the creature looked back to him and nodded. It's beastly mind cooling at the words of its master, ready to rip and tear when unleashed but calm until then.

"Interesting choice, let's start with Geodude!" Brock tossed out a small rock creature with two arms and a face. Geodude wasn't much to look out but it was still a fucking rock.

"Begin!"

"Let's start off with Poison Barrage and Tail Whip." Ordered Menma, waiting for Brock to make the first move to get into melee range, missiles of poison shot from Nidorino and it wiggled its stubby tail, not much of an outward effect, but it lowered the guard of other Pokemon with how silly it was, enough to make the next move hit harder at least.

"Defense Curl." Menma cursed under his breath, what a waste of a move then. The Barrage struck true and turned Geodude into a pincushion of noxious gas and dark purple fluid, Geodude's eyes hazed slightly as it was hit by the deathly power of the Poison.

"Double Kick." Brock either didn't notice or suspected it didn't work because he ordered Geodude on, into a Headbutt, Nidorino jumped over its prey just enough to avoid the attack but low enough to strike true with two powerful leg kicks to the back, Geodude's rock body began to break apart as it howled in pain, the poison fluid pouring into the now open wound of the hard arteries beneath, it quickly passed out from shock. Brock rapidly returned the creature and reconsidered his strategy, he called out another sibling, a girl this time, she took the Ball into the back to tend to it.

"That was really clever, I underestimated your Nidorino, I won't make that mistake again." Menma nodded his head and gestured the man on, "Let's go, Graveler!" The evolved form of Geodude, a larger rock creature, but this time it had stubby legs in place of levitation, a pair of sneering eyes and a smaller pair of arms on its stomach along with he pair on its shoulders.

"Grav." Growled out the creature, Nidorino just barked at it, the creature smirked, Collette giggled.

"He said 'I'll use your remains as a stepping _stone_ to victory'." Menma groaned, that was both witty and punny, he had no idea that Nido' had that kind of quip lined up.

"That's just shocking." Said Menma shaking his head, "Whatever... Alright, we'll start strong this time, Focus Energy." Ordered Menma, Nidorino was encircled by the projected aura of his own strength, the creature snorted out a blast of steam as its skin coloured red for a moment, its horn keeping the sheen.

"Rollout." Ordered Brock, Graveler balled up and shot towards Nidorino.

"Again." Once more Nidorino focused, it's muscles bulging beneath its skin and its fangs growing slightly as it hunched forward, Graveler began closing in quickly, "Use your horn as a ramp and send it into the air, then use Double Kick." Menma had commanded trust in his Pokemon, all of them, and he got it for a damned good reason. He used his fucking brain.

Brock was wide eyed when he saw the leverage and force of his own Pokemon turned against it, Nidorino sent it into the air, before leaping after it with two red glowing hind legs, with a savage roar Nidorino slammed both his hind legs into the Graveler with enough force to open its hide and expose the soft flesh beneath, Graveler's back was slowly gaining a very red sheen as blood poured from the open wound. With another kick Nido' sent his foe deep into the ground and landed on top of it with a powerful _thump_.

Nidorino spat out the blood of its foe, clearly he wasn't a fan of Rock Type. Brock returned his Pokemon, once more with great haste, and began to worry slightly, not over the safety of his Pokemon, the Gym was well stocked with healing items, and the Centre was very close. No he was worried over his own ability as a trainer if he could be bested so handily but someone, who while older than him, technically counted as 'New' Trainer.

Poor Brock, he was doing fine. Now if he lost to Ash, then Menma would come back and tell him to just quit while he was behind, at least that's what Collette thought would happen. She'd been reading the young mans reactions, and mind, since the battle started and quickly he began to doubt himself.

"Brock, I must say you are giving my Nidorino quite the challenge, I've yet to see him this invested in a battle yet. Thank you for that." Menma tilted his head slightly, Brock had a smile grow on his face, it wasn't all bad at least.

"Well it's certainly interesting I'll say that, the battle that is." Acquiesed Brock with a nod, "But let's finish this up shall we?" He suggest and presented his final Poke Ball, this time it was an Onix, a rock snake in every sense of the word. Onix was long, large and made completely of stone, a horn of rock jutting from its skull, Onix loomed over Nidorino ominously, who only grinned like the Devil before virgin.

" _This seems a little unfair..._ " Thought Menma, the way he'd win this already in his mind. "King." He addressed Nidorino, the creature looking at him curiously, "Earn that name, and you can keep it." 'King' grinned and nodded, "Good, now... how well do you think you can spread 'Double Kick'? Can you do a 'Quadra Kick'?" Asked Menma, King looked at his legs and tapped each of them onto the ground.

"Nido." He nodded in response, ' _I think I can'_. Conveyed Collette, angel that she was.

"Onix, use wrap!" Ordered Brock, Onix sped forward, obviously King was having none of it, and dashed away, the Focus Energy still heightening his abilities, he ran circles around the snake, as it tried to pin him constantly.

"Use Quadra Kick and climb Onix's body until you reach the head, then bury it!" Ordered Menma with a boom, King did just that and leapt onto Onix's body each step was a powerful crater creating _thump_ on the stone body, Onix wailed as it's world was consumed by pain, the innate weakness to 'Fighting' moves working well to King's advantage. Onix dropped like a sack of potatoes, and King barely broke a sweat.

Damn he must have been one tough sonoffabitch when he was wild.

Menma offered thanks to whatever luck he had as he'd struck gold with this little fellow. The way King could adapt to new maneuvers on the fly was nothing short of prodigious. He doubted he'd have this kind of luck for a while when it came to wild Pokemon, but he counted the blessing for what it was, a good ol' fashion stroke of luck.

Onix moan pitifully, begging to be returned, Brock granted the creatures wish and it was sucked away into stasis, Menma snapped his fingers and King came to his side, as he walked towards the Gym Leader, offering his hand, Brock accepted it humbly.

"You showed me quite a lot, mostly to never take chances with my opponents. I'll be more direct in the future, thank you, Menma. I think I can grow as a trainer because of this." Menma smiled and placed a hand on the guys shoulder, and dug into his pack with the other.

He presented a ball to Brock, opening it to reveal a Rhyhorn. A big, burly stone rhinoceros. "I think this guy can help you with that. He doesn't have a name so if you feel he can earn one, give it to him. Rhyhorn. You'll be staying with Brock for the immediate future, help him sharpen his fangs." Rhyhorn nodded with a snort of air.

"I can't accept this, Menma." Rebuked Brock, Menma just pushed the ball into the boys hand.

"Rhyhorn is a strong creature, but he's still young and I've never had the time to really sit down and help him evolve, Rhyhorns take quite a while to mature FYI, and I travel to much for it to be any kind of stable environment. So you keep him for now, and when you feel you and he have grown together, we'll battle again. If I beat him with King, I'll take him back. If I lose, you can keep him."

Brock looked at the Ball in his hand and smiled, like a weight had lifted and a passion had been ignited, "You can count on us, right Rhyhorn?" The creature roared with a triumphant bluster, "You've got a deal Menma, until we meet again." The pair shook hands and Menma left, badge in hand and goth on his arm.

Truth be told he knew Rhyhorn would love this kind of thing, evolution problems or not the beast would enjoy being around such an environment, and he loved kids. So that was a bonus.

Menma smiled as he looked at his new badge, pinning it to his bag he kissed the smaller hand in his own, "Shall we away, my dear?" He asked with a theatrical bow. Collette laughed into her free hand and swooned dramatically.

"Oh yes you great stallion you." She said breathily, Menma produced Pidgeot's ball and took off towards Mt. Moon, he'd been through there once before many years ago and he needed to check if a certain stone vein was still there.

 _ **End**_

 **Hello my lovelies, can I just say fuck yes? Because** _ **this**_ **is the kind of response I crave. Man you guys are just the bee's fuckin' knees. Hopefully you enjoy this story even more as it progresses.**

 **Don't forget to drop a quickie and I'll see you all next time :D**

 _ **Raxychaz!**_


	4. Chapter 4

**SinOfDistaster: Those** _ **can**_ **be rather draining to write I'll not lie. That's basically why I've gone with my less murder-fuckery stories recently. That and it's always to write to the people who appreciate a little deviation from the norm.**

 **T51b Moridin: I'll toss in a few flashbacks, or write a whole different story I don't know how but I'll see if I can give you what you desire my good sir. Because that would be a good bit of fun.**

 **Simon D. Uzumaki: Don't worry Ash will show up less and less, basically because he's already several days behind Menma by the start of this Chapter, due what whatever fuckery happens in Pewter. I'll have a little sneak-peak on what happened in the next chapter though as to how that went.**

 **Eternal-Tundra: You'll love this chapter then my darling reader XD.**

 **Extreme-UnDEAD: Always loved Brock. The sheer amount of patience he had to have in cannon, oh ma lawd. The bitch lesson will happen, but not any time soon.**

 **Shadow Of God: We'll see my friend, we shall see.**

 **Start!**

Mt. Moon, quite a nice lot of caves if you ignore the carnivorous Zubat swarms. Though you could drive them off easily enough if you toss some bait, and leg it, you can avoid the worst of it. He had to have his faithful Arcanine, Axel, guide the way through, mostly due to the fact that Axel could illuminate his fur with fire and not toast himself or Collette. It only took about an hour of wandering about to make their way to the old stone location, Menma hopped off the giant wolf-lion thing. Axel sat on his haunches and scratches his ears.

Menma pulled out a torch and flicked it on, the shaft of light was waved across the wall as he tried to find the spot, "It looks like it's been mined out... or clawed out." Clawed made more sense as as there were several scratch marks around the dugout area, he pulled out another ball, this one let out a Mightyena a smaller black wolf creature with grey underfur and a pair of dark blue eyes, "Can you get any kind of scent." The wolf sniffed the area and barked before running off, Menma jumped back onto Axel and bayed him on, the Legendary Pokemon followed after the smaller quadruped easily. Deeper and deeper into the mountain, but at one point they began going up, until they reached a small enclave of Clefairy.

In the centre of their little home was a large black, shiny, stone that stood like an altar to the skies. Menma produced King's Pokeball and let the creature out, returning Mightyena after an ear scratch. King shook himself off and observed the Moonstone, "Go on. Once you evolve we can push even harder." Said Menma, gesturing the creature on, the Clefairy looked scared at the sight of the Nidorino, he smelt of blood. They huddled away like cowards at his approach, he stood before the Moonstone, and dramatically as possible, as shaft of moonlight pierced the cave and illuminated the stone, the light in turn bathed King in its silver light.

The creature that came as a result was Nidoking, the final evolution of the Nidoran Male line. It should be noted immediately that unlike most that were trained by soft handed fools, King was all muscle, none of that pudgy bullshit that came from suppliments or the like. Instead of the usual gut he had a hard abdominal grate that could be used to cut rock. Bipedal now and with dark purple armoured skin, King was a force to be reckoned with. The creature roared loudly, enough to shake the cave a little before turning back to his trainer and stalking forward.

Menma leveled an even stare at King who nodded to him, respect and gratitude in his eyes, "You're welcome." The trainer said with a small smile, causing a grin to break onto King's face, that stony resolve melting into happiness.

"Well well well what _do_ we have here?" Came an oily voice, Menma, Axel, King, and Collette all turned to see a collection of Team Rocket members, all armed with a pistol on their hips, and Pokeballs on their belts, Menma stiffened. There were 9 of these people and sure he could have them all cooked by Axel, but then they may still have the sense to fire on them.

Menma listened as the man continued, fishing into his bag at the same time, "Now listen here, guy. That big ol' rock there is wanted by the Boss. So we'll be taking it, and that fancy little pet of yours." He said gesturing to Collette with his pistol, all the other Rocketeers drew arms and produced their Pokemon, mostly Raticates and Golbats, but still.

So he threw caution to the wind and released the Pokemon from the ball within his hand, a towering figure popped up before him, an armoured monolith of rock skin and devastation. A tyranitar, but instead of the usual grey-green colour to its skin, this one had silver skin. Its eyes were deep red and the heavier armoured parts on its stomach were dark blue.

Tyranitar roared, loudly enough to unbalance the Grunts, "Rockslide." Ordered Menma with a deathly cold voice, bullets began flying along with various attacks from the Pokemon, only for the rocks around them to fall down, Tyranitar had stomped it's foot and caused a cave in, the Grunts began to scream as they were buried beneath the rubble, Menma stalked out from behind his companion and came face to face with the ringleader, he'd only been buried up to his shoulders.

"When you get to hell, tell them Menma sent you." And with that he withdrew his 44. and shot the man in the throat, turned and left to his team and the pathetic fairy Pokemon huddled away in the corner. "Can you dig us out of here, Molag?" Asked Menma, the giant beast nodded and began walking into the nearest wall, just walking, and ended up clearing a path, Menma felt a laugh bubble up as he jumped back picked Collette up off Axel and set her down, "I'll call you guys out when we get to town, I'm sure everyone will wanna stretch their legs." Axel barked an affirmative, whilst King thumped his chest, he returned them both and jogged to catch up with Molag.

"It's been a while since the big guy came out, quick thinking." Praised Collette with a smile, before it softened, "I'm glad you're safe."

"I _was_ worried that they'd start shooting before I could get him out but I guess he liked the idea of monologuing more than getting his job done." Menma commented with a breathy sigh, shaking his head he brushed a stray clump dirt that fell from the 'ceiling'.

 **Route 4**

They emerged into the sunlight and Molag shook the dirt off himself, Menma grabbed a fist full of shrunken Poke Balls and threw them into the air, before doing this again and again, a small hoard of Pokemon appeared before him. There was every eeveelution. Axel, Pidgeot, King, Mightyena, Houndoom, Honchcrow, Empoleon, Typhlosion, Meganium, Skarmory, Flygon.

Yes he could have gotten them all out but he wanted at least some breathing room for the moment.

He was set upon by the affectionate quadrupeds, he was buried under a tide of fur and happiness. His Sylveon was especially bad for this because she had to evolve through affection, much like Crobat. Speaking of the bat was perched happily atop Empleon's crown. The stoic Water/Steel type watching the proceedings with an even gaze.

Menma's arms shot up as he held Sylveon at arms length, like a cat she curled her tail around his forearm and cooed at him, he shook his head and sat with his legs crossed, placing her in his lap she rubbed her head against his stomach, Umbreon and Espeon got all jellyfish and demanded more cuddles, as did Jolteon and Flareon. Glaceon and Vaporeon were sitting back slightly giggling to themselves and Leafeon was being a weirdo and rubbing the grass with her cheeks.

He'd been oddly lucky, or unlucky, to get almost all female Eevee's. Jolteon was male but still was a little attention whore like the rest of them.

"Yes yes I love you too." He assured the pink and cream-white coloured Pokemon in his lap, she looked up at him with those big blue eyes and _pouted_ at him. "No you can't come out more, if the current trend continues you might end up getting snatched up by Team Rocket, you're too delicate for battle we both know that." Since he only had to be sickeningly sweet with Sylveon she didn't fight much, or at all. She was softer bodied than the rest of them who he still had to train properly to be strong enough to fight in conditions to evolve, in the case of Vapor', Jolt' and Flare' he had to train them to learn the new moves that came with their evolution.

She pouted heavier and rubbed her cheeks on his, "Come on now, no need for that." He assured, stroking her back with one hand whilst rubbing Umbreon's chin with the other, they apparently were unhappy with this and demanded more affection, knocking him onto his back and curling up all around him. "Picnic anyone?" He asked helplessly.

Finally Collette broken and burst out laughing.

 **A Short While Later**

Menma was being used as a hanging post for his smaller Pokemon whilst Collette sat near him, barely containing her giggles, Skarmory and Empoleon had gone to a nearby river and fished up quite the feed, Meganium was happily gorging herself on some berries and doing some good ol' photosynthesis to sustain herself, Houndoom and Axel cooked it all in the pit that Molag had dug for them, Typlosion sunned himself while he waited for food with Flygon and finally Honchcrow discussed a few things with King and Mightyena.

Menma bit into his fish constantly trying to keep it away from snippy little Sylveon who wanted him to feed her, needly little shit. He said that with love.

"Honch!" Cawed the giant crow, Menma followed where he was pointing and saw Team Rocket's balloon in the sky.

"Sick 'em boy." Ordered the trainer, the crow laughed and took off into the air like a bullet, its body being coated in a dark stream as it passed like a comet through the balloon and popped that fucker like a virgins cherry, before zipping back down and retaking his seat. As his clawed toes hit the ground the balloon finished plummeting into the river.

"That'll learn ya." Muttered Menma, "No!" He snapped as Sylveon once more tried to take his fish as he took a bit, she whined and rolled over in his lap, showing her stomach, she pat it with her paws and whined more. "You've already finished your food zippy. So how about you let me eat mine in peace." Glaceon chided her and smacked her sibling gently on the head with her tail, Sylveon just whined more and looked as piteous as possible.

"I spoiled you." He said with a shake of his head, rubbing her belly with his free hand making her coo, Umbreon puffed her cheeks and huffed, Espeon just giggled.

"Skar." Skarmory began, getting his trainers attention, the creature pecked at his wrist. "Skar."

"Yes, yes I still have it." He said, playing the game of mystery as he pleased. Skarmory nodded and went into his bag, digging out its ball and returning itself, pleased with the meal and the rest. Menma placed the ball back into his bag, with some effort as Flareon was over his shoulders, who immediately whined that he was moving instead of being a useful pillow.

"Flaaaaare." Whined the Fire Type, Menma tsked and rubbed her head. Before grabbing what was left on his plate and jammed it in his mouth, getting annoyed with Silvy's constant nipping. His cheeks bulged as the herbed meat was stuffed into his mouth, he humed a 'Nurny nur nur' to Silvy. Smug little shit giggled at him. Swallowing after a few moments of glare-chewing he sighed.

"Alright, enough of this. I'll let you all out tonight, we'll camp out and have a jolly little slumber party, ok?" He promised with a sigh, the creatures gave a collective call of joy as he returned them all, sighing and falling onto his back he was met with the barking laughter of Houndoom and Typhlosion. Lifting his head up just enough he glared at them, they wisely shut up.

"It's like having daughters." Menma grumbled.

"Daughters that think you're their chewtoy and pillow." Collette added with a chime.

"So daughters?"

 **Cerulean City**

Typhlosion remained out as he was bored and wanted to walk about for a change, the others were content enough to stay in their balls. The bulky fire type was sleek as usual but like most of his kin under the trainer he was built to be a machine of melee combat. Not to say he couldn't melt a motherfuckers face off, because he could, but Typhlosion was more than willing to throw down at a moments notice, the thing was that most of his breed were more inclined towards Special Attacks, but to supplement any possible weakness Menma had him trained with Molag, after he got him, to beef him up a bit. It bloody worked I can tell you whut.

"Hey you!" Called out a vaguely familiar voice, Menma looked to his right to see the young man he saw before, "That's a pretty powerful looking Typhlosion you got there." He praised with a smirk.

"Thank you, Helios and I have been together for... oh I wanna say coming on four years now?" Menma turned to ask the big creature who shook one of his hands in a 'close enough' sort of motion. "But yes, he's quite strong for his age, I'm proud of him." Affirmed the trainer.

"Would you be up for a quick battle, I wanna see how well my team can go up against a stronger opponent." Asked the boy, Menma smiled and nodded.

"I'd be pleased to, I am Menma Uzumaki. My Typhlosion is aptly named, Helios, and this is Collette." He introduced them all.

"Pleasure to meet you, Gary." Said the Psychic type with a smirk, getting a surprised look from the boy. "Telepathy, darling. Nothing to be afraid of."

"I was more surprised that you spoke, I've never met a Pokemon capable of speech before, sorry. You are right though, Gary Oak. Nice to meetcha." Menma and Gary walked a few paces back from one another, Helios stayed in his place, the street became the battleground as people crowded around at a safe distance, Collette concentrated for a moment before creating a thin barrier around the cleared area, it took a bit of concentration but she managed to erect it, she wouldn't be able to repair or sustain it, but it would stand until broken by a strong enough attack.

 **Pokemon, Battle Theme (Colosseum Normal Battle)**

"We'll just go until someone surrenders shall we?" Asked Menma, Helios's shoulders enflameds, as well did his tail, and he cracked his neck and rolled his arms out loose, the creature was more than ready to go.

Gary nodded and tossed out his first Pokemon a Wartortle. A turtle creature, blue skin and brown shell with white wave like ears and a curled spiral tail. Wartortle grunted in the face of Helios, kid had balls if nothing else.

"Lets go, you first." Said Menma, grandiosely.

"Wartortle, Rapid Spin!" Ordered Gary, with speed unlike most creatures of its kind Wartortle shot forward, ducking into its shell, Helios sidestepped the attack and, with a red glowing fist, struck the turtle, not harming it so much as dazing it.

As the his struck Helios was encompassed by a red glow. "That would be Power-Up Punch, each time it lands he get stronger." Menma informed, Gary was a little off balance but kept his cool.

"Use Water Gun and spin into Whirlpool!" Clever indeed, Wartortle struck Helios in the chest with the blast of high pressure water and then released several more, angled streams to spin on the spot, all the water became a great whirlpool that leapt upon Helios.

"Use Fire Wheel and turn that water to steam." Ordered Menma, Helios grinned before becoming, well what you would expect, a wheel of flame, rolling up into a circle and creating a storm of fire in its wake the Pokemon turned the others attack into hot, moist air. "Now follow up with another Power-Up Punch." Helios darted forward, careful to avoid another Watergun and struck the turtle with such force it was forced out of its shell to escape the painful vibrations.

"Now use Flame Charge. Be careful not to kill." Menma liked Gary's spunk, and if nothing else the boy had a brain, he'd had to snuff out that passion so quickly. Like a bullet of red hot pain, Helios shot towards the turtle and struck it in the softer, underside of its shell, Wartortle simply couldn't take any more pain and fell over, unconscious, burn marks on its body in random places.

"Return... well done. I can see that appearance isn't everything, Helios can really back it up." He looked at the tightly wound form of the Fire Type and thought for a moment, he needed to remember he wasn't in this battle to win he was in this battle to test himself and his team.

"Phlooo!" Roared Helios, his fire burning hotter as his battle-hunger grew, he loved a good fight, even one where he was teaching the younglings about strength, this was all harmless fun to him. The people looking on saw the majestic creature and were awed by its strength.

"Alright, let's do this, Pidgeotto!" Ariel advantage would sure allow him to try something different. Pidgeotto was like a better version of Pidgey, nothing too impressive but still better than garden trash, and this one looked to have good genetics on its side if the richer colouration in its crest was anything to go by.

Collette picked the boys brain for a moment and almost giggled at the similarities between him and her lover, they both overlooked Spearow and Fearow due to their less than pleasant looks.

"Pidgeotto use gust to create a cyclone around Helios, suck all the oxygen outta of those flames." Ordered Gary and so the creature did just that, Helios though wasn't having any of that and rushed forward, passing through that gathering winds and leapt into the air, surprising Gary into silence as he watched with morbid fascination as the bigger Pokemon plucked his Pidgeotto out of the air and slammed it into the ground, the cracking noise of its wings drew his hand to its ball and he returned it.

Menma whistled for Helios to come back, he was calling this off, he saw all he needed to. Collette tore down the barrier as her partner walked towards the boy. "Good ideas, I suppose execution can't really be counted due to circumstance but I like the way you think Gary, keep that up and you'll go far." Praised Menma patting the young boys shoulder, "Helios how do you think it went."

A big toothy grin and a thumbs up was all they needed.

Gary smiled, and even chuckled a bit. "Thanks, but I know I got a long way to go. This helped me see that, however short it was, I enjoyed our battle Menma. I hope we can do it again, when my team can match yours evenly." Gary offered a hand and the older trainer took it without hesitation.

"I'd like that Gary, I really would."

 **End.**

 **So the way I kind of want this to go is for Menma to throw a few pearls of wisdom to those who he thinks will use them well, and offer his experienced eye to the potential career trainers of Kanto.**

 **Drop a review if you liked it, I'll have another one soon for ya.**

 _ **Raxychaz!**_


	5. Chapter 5

**Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeelcome back darlings.**

 **Extreme-UnDEAD: Yeah, always liked ol' Gazza, he's actually competent.**

 **Anon-kun: Why thank you, Helios was sitting in my head from the start. Good to see it went down well.**

 **Thank you all for your reviews and love, that make my loins tingle with joy. I'll see you on the other side.**

 **Start!**

Menma and his little party of furballs roused around midday, Sylveon was sleeping on his face, many other 'eons all over his body, Collette to the side. The little enclosure he'd had his Venusaur, Flora, make of leaves and vines was bloody brilliant. Said giant green reptile/plant was snoozing happily with the sun pouring onto her large tree-like bulb.

Menma rose up and spilled fluff everywhere, moans of discontent came from the swarm of cute little quadrupeds. Glaceon stretched out and climbed onto his shoulders, emitting a wave of frosty mist, cooling his body down from all the extra head of the 'eon snuggle he had last night. "You're an angel." He murmured, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he nudged Collette, she rolled over and saw her partner swamped with fur and chuckled.

"Now that's quite the sight." She said, "Big bold Menma covered in adorable pups who get jealous if he gives anyone else attention."

"Oh bite me." He muttered plucking Umbreon off his pants so he could get dressed, she whined of course, they always bloody do, "And _don't_ say 'I already do'. That joke is old."

"I was gonna say they already have." She tapped her neck, and he felt a few new ridges is his shoulder and neck, he looked at Leafeon who giggled, but was too busy synthesizing like a fool.

"Bloody children." He grumbled and left the natural tent, followed closely by the puppy parade.

A short walk later and Menma was sitting in the river, his kiddos splashing around, with the exception of Flareon, she liked to sit in the water but didn't like getting too much on her, so she was just sitting quietly. Menma decided 'fuck it' and flopped onto his back and floated on his back, using Glaceon as barrier so he didn't end up floating down the stream.

"I wonder how Brock and Rhyhorn are?" He pondered for a moment.

 **Pewter Gym**

"Rhyhorn, Magnitude!" Ordered Brock as once more his new friend trounced a small mouse Pokemon, this had been a running theme in the past few days, at one point Ash had come back a lot stronger, but it didn't matter, Rhyhorn was Rock/Ground Type and had the Lightning Rod ability so any tricky electricity moves that could have gone on were trounced due to the said ability.

Pikachu fell back and black out, Ash grit his teeth and returned the small creature, "Ash why don't you go out and try to catch other Pokemon? A Butterfree, a Pidgeotto and a Pikachu aren't exactly the most extensive arsenal." Suggest Brock, but Ash just stormed out again, Misty had begun her trip back to Cerulean after the third attempt by the black haired boy, saying that she wasn't even that fond of the bike.

Mostly she was sick of putting up with his sulking.

Brock rolled his eyes, Rhyhorn grunted and laid down, Brock's siblings coming over for their rides. This brought a smile to the young man's face this made him happy, with how well his current trend was going with _all_ challengers he was able to get a larger stipend for the Gym and in turn could provide better for his siblings, unlike his deadbeat father.

 **Menma; Cerulean City**

After the arduous process of returning his Eeveelutions Menma was able to actually approach the Gym finally. As he arrived he was greeted by a man, this man looked to be the curator of the Gym Challenges, he held a small book and had a warm smile on his face, "Welcome to the Cerulean City Gym, are you here to challenge the Leaders?"

Menma nodded, "I am, is the Leader available now?" Menma asked, Collette was stickybeaking about the place, it was a large pool with several small islands for non-water type Pokemon to stand on, it seemed quite biased towards a singular type but one could forgive it considering most Water Types were frail as glass out of it.

"One of them are, yes. Miss Lilly, come with me and we'll get it organised." Menma nodded in thanks to the man and gestured he lead on, Collette falling into step and taking his arm once more.

"Weren't these women famous for their theatrical performances with their Pokemon? Hardly Gym leader material." Mumbled the Psychic type.

"They may surprise you." Collette was unsure weather he was trying to convince her, or himself.

"Miss Lilly, are you still free? This young man would like to challenge the Gym." The Coordinator asked, a young woman with long wavy red hair, and ocean blue eyes, she currently wore a rather simple but well designed purple dress with a light grey blouse over the top.

"I am Theo, hello my names Lilly. It's a pleasure to meet you." Greeted the woman with a smile, Menma offered his hand and she took it, before her eyes cast to the oddly dressed Pokemon. "Oh my you're so beautiful!" She swooned.

Collette preened under the attention, "Why thank you my dear, I do try." She decided to wear her 'natural' dress today as her other clothes were drying back at their little camp, Flora was still there so it's not like they were in any kind of danger from being robbed. Lilly looked ecstatic at the fact she could speak.

"After the battle we should chat more, I have a feeling we'll get along swimmingly." Menma paused, Collette paused and both stared at her silently.

"Was that a _pun!?_ " Questioned the man with incredulity, Lilly blushed but chuckled. "That was flawlessly done, seamless as possible. I applaud your wit, Miss Lilly." He clapped for good humour and smiled widely, before letting out a few chuckles to let out all that mirth, "Shall we?" He gestured to the field, she nodded, Collette sat in the viewing stands with the Coordinator, a screen came out from behind a wall revealing pictures of them both with three red and white symbols below, "An automated referee? Interesting." He commented.

"It's something we were quite pleased to get." Added Lilly she prepared her first Pokeball as did Menma both threw them at the same time, one was easily dwarfing the other.

Lilly had sent out a Seaking, a large fish with orange and black colourations on its body, and long flowing white fins, with a large ivory coloured horn. Menma had brought a Gyarados to a water-pistol fight. Literally in this case, Gyarados easily took up a good portion of the arena. Lilly visibly paled at the sight of it.

"Gyarados open up with Dragon Rage." Ordered Menma as the alert to start played, Gyarados shot an orb of green fire towards Seaking who, without a command to the contrary took the shot head on, Lilly quickly got herself back together and ordered Seaking to rebuke with a Horn Drill, it's horn glowing an unstable white.

Gyarados sunk into the water and snaked around the move, instead appearing back out of the water with Seaking in its gaping maw, "I suggest you give this one to him, or he'll eat it." Advised Menma as Seaking began to have trouble breathing due to being out of the water and the crushing power of Gyarados' maw.

Without a word Lilly returned Seaking, one of the symbols on the screen greyed out, Menma returned Gyarados, his symbol fading slightly but remaining stable, he threw out another ball as did Lilly, this time he'd brought Jolteon to the fight, the Electric Type barking happily at him, he gestured to the arena a little way of saying 'not now'. Jolteon got the message and focused happily enough.

Lilly had sent out a Starmie, a starfish that was purple and had a big gem in the centre of its face, Menma had to admit he'd plucked a few of those in his time, to make ends meet. It wasn't glamorous work but it was a living.

Anyway he ordered Jolteon to electrify the water, so Starmie had to leap into the air, self-preservation and all, then Jolteon struck it with a leaping Volt Tackle, the creature was slammed into the wall, and slid down, unconscious and bloodied. Jolteon landed without even rocking the island and looked at Lilly with a vicious little smile.

"I figured Gyarados was overkill." Menma said, as Lilly returned Starmie, she looked at him like he was a few bullets short of a magazine, "I've been traveling for a decade, my dear. This is just a formality, I take now joy in it but It has to be done." That made her take a moment to give an 'Oh' of realization. Unlike Brock this woman knew who she was and wanted to be, so she didn't need and life lessons from him, this was just business and now that she knew that she could take off the kiddy gloves. She produced a final 'Ball, this one was a Cloyster basically a giant, vertical clam with a rather nasty looking 'head' that bore a possibly permanent grin, Menma watched as it landed in the water unphased.

"Thunderbolt." Streams of electricity poured from Jolteon and towards the Water Type.

"Iron Defense." The jolts bounced off the creature and instead shot into the water. Menma smiled for a moment.

"Thunder Wave." This time the move struck too quickly and instead of being able to defend itself Cloyster was stunned due to paralysis, "Now use Thunder." A great storm of powerful electricity shot into the pool, Jolteon's attack hit with such force the Cloyster was smoking and fried from all the volts being forced into its body.

Cloyster floated up to the surface, frothing at the mouth, and was returned, Menma and Lilly stepped down from their respective podiums when the auto-ref declared him winner and met halfway on one side of the pool, "Formality or not, that was a wonderful display. Thank you." Lilly said, holding out the badge to him, it was a small blue teardrop, he notched it onto his bag and the pair shook hands.

"Now let's go get lunch!" Chirped the woman with a grin, Menma shook his head with amusement as Collette came over.

"Lead on, we'd be happy to."

 **That Night**

Menma had left the Centre, leaving Jolteon and Gyarados with the Nurse more out of habit than anything else. He was just going for a stroll at the moment whilst Collette mingled with Lilly and her sisters, apparently all of them were fawning over the beauteous Gardevoir.

Menma was clad once more in a pair of shorts and a singlet, this time with proper shoes instead of sandals on and his bag over his shoulder, he decided to go for a bit of a walk as the weather allowed him, he ended up near the river again, this time though he was privy to the sight of the pair of rocketeers he'd scared off before, they seemed to be on a radio of some kind with someone thoroughly grilling them. Mockery and banter was exchanged before it ended up with an apparent plan to seize Cerulean to show Rocket wasn't messing about anymore. They'd already had some Grunts posted in a house in the city limit and would use that to filter more in.

Menma frowned but decided to err on the side of getting shit done and fished out another Pokeball, this ended up releasing a creature known as Gengar, a purple stout ghost with large eyes and a large mouth, it was a little hard to describe Gengar above, rotund. Gengar greeted its trainer with a wave, "Follow them, and warn me when they begin their plan to attack the city." Gengar nodded and saluted, before turning invisible. Menma stalked off to the Gym to pick up Collette.

Shit was about to go down, as the kids say.

 **Next Day**

Menma had a rather terrible sleep that night, he was so paranoid about being alert and about during the imminent incident he couldn't get more than an hour at a time. It was a rather large drag on his mood. But Gengar reported back to him, the creature came to warn him during the early hours of the morning, he got up, Collette was too tired for any kind of adventuring at the moment so he put her in her ball to keep her safe, flew into some clothes and legged it out of the Centre, Rocketeers were already infesting the city town by this point, "Hey you!" Groused one of them only to take a bullet to the knee, the man fell over screaming, Gengar turned invisible as a large squadron of Rocket Grunts poured out of the woodworks.

"Bad move, kid." Rumbled the largest man, the leader from the slightly different uniform, "Very bad move. Men, take him out." And they would have, were it not for the fact they all began to see something move just out of the corner of their vision, before they all knew it every Rocketeer was snared in Gengar's Hypnosis, forced to go through terror filled images the Ghost Pokemon put them under.

"A hand would be nice." He summoned both Molag and Flora, the pair of monoliths looked at the writhing forms of the Grunts, "Tie them up, Flora. Molag watch over them while I go get those bumbling fools to do their fucking job."

"Stop. Right. There." Ordered a voice, Menma turned to see a man in a suit with a flared collar, a grey scarf hanging over his shoulder on each end of the scarf were red R's, he had short black hair and narrow, hawk like eyes. "You and I will be sorting this young man, the Police needn't be involved."

"And how do you plan to 'sort' it?" Menma shot back with a frown.

"A simple battle, if you win me and mine will leave. If I win, you work for me." A simple deal.

"I accept, anything to avoid those wastes of flesh." Grunted Menma, "What's your name?"

"Giovanni, feel free to call me 'Boss." Giovanni suggested, Menma scoffed, "And you? Future employee, what's your name?"

"Menma Uzumaki."

 **(BGM: Team Rocket Battle Remix - GlitchxCity)**

"King!" Commanded the Uzumaki.

"Rhydon!" Boomed the Rocket Boss, a giant stone monolith with a spiral horn and thick, tree stump thick arms appeared, the beast had big red eyes and glowered menacingly at King. Who scoffed and snorted in response.

"King, we battle for blood. Feel free to be as wild as you see fit." Said Menma, King's usually cyan coloured eyes were dyed red as his breath came out in thick clouds of steam, his body temperature rising drastically as his heart thundered in his chest.

"Horn Attack!" Ordered Giovanni, Rhydon rapidly closed the distance, but King weaved away from the taller creature and struck it with a roundhouse to the ribs.

"Keep it up! Flurry!" Ordered Menma, 'Quadra Kick' sounded so stupid in hindsight. King's limbs lit up with red energy as he began to savagely beat down upon his opponent.

"Harden, then Stone Edge!" Ordered Giovanni, Rhydon was coated in a sheen of silver, King winced as he struck the much harder surface of Rhydon's skin, and was struck in the chest with a jagged cluster of stones, forcing him back, "Now use Horn Attack!" Then took a glowing horn to the shoulder as he barely managed to twist.

"Wrap your tail around its arm and use its own weight to throw it over!" Ordered Menma, seeing the crimson stain his companions chest, though this only seemed to spur King on more. He did as commanded and flipped the larger Pokemon over, King roared in Rhydon's face. "Now savage the fucker with Flurry!" Once more filled with red energy King began to strike with enough force to create Magnitude 2's with each strike, further damaging the creature beneath him.

"Now activate Poison Point with Noxious Barrage!" Since King's Poison Sting seemed to release a disastrous fume after each of the barbs popped it felt fitting to rename that particular ability. Slowly but surely with each strike of his fists King began to be coated in his poisonous barbs and then with a hammer punch to the jaw he released the barrage directly into his foes now open mouth before delivering a bone shatteringly powerful kick and sealing it shut.

The poison exploded in Rhydon's mouth and the last thought it had was just how fucking quickly it got the tables turned back onto it.

"King, step away from the hardened meat." Ordered Menma as he saw the hungry look in his companions eyes, "Eat later. This isn't over." The haze cleared enough for the beast to hear his masters call and did as commanded, standing beside his trainer King waited patiently for Giovanni's next move.

The man smirked, "Heh, well done. Exceeded my expectations. I suppose this time we'll clear out. Keep this up kid, I look forward to meeting you more in the future." Giovanni called down a helicopter, Menma waited until the man was about to board before pulling his gun out and shooting him 4 times in the back, two in the centre and the other two around the kidney region.

Giovanni began shaking from the shock before falling onto his face, dead.

Menma kept his stance for a moment before putting a final bullet into the man's head, "Sorry to disappoint but I don't play to chance." Menma slipped his gun back into his jacket and returned Gengar, Flora had done her work and so was returned as well, along with Molag. The pilot was horrified, "King." Began Menma, getting the attention of the creature.

"Sick 'em." And with a bloodthirsty roar, he did.

Oh by Arceus' supple tits did he fuckin' ever.

 **End.**

 **If you enjoyed it, lemme know what parts you did, if you have any suggestions chuck em up and I'll let'cha know by next chapter.**

 _ **Raxychaz!**_


	6. Chapter 6

**So I've been filthy sick for a little bit and writing is more of a chore than usual, mostly because my thoughts consist of 'Ugh flem' 'Ugh sore' 'ugh, where's my porn'. You know, sick stuff.**

 **Not to say I haven't been writing, RWBY story for example. I'm just saying between that, work and chrissy coming up it'll be slow updates. And I'm sorry for that.**

 **General consensus is that chapter 5 was fan-tucking-fastic, this makes my jibbles tingle with joy. I'll aim to get the same response :D.**

 **Simon D. Uzumaki: Nom nom, grunts. Either way people were fucking chomped on by a giant purple lizard. But yes, King ate them all.**

 **Twilight Lloyd: Yeah, preeeetty much. Kinda blows me away that people forget that.**

 **Extreme-UnDEAD: That day is not today.**

 **So thank you to all the happy little pandas, much jibble-tingles to you.**

 **Start!**

From the back of a Pidgeot the world seemed much smaller, but Menma was not exactly interested in philosophical thought at the moment as he and his giant bird flew towards the mountain range east of Cerulean, he had a few things he wanted to hunt around for and it would give time for things to cool down.

He'd killed before, it takes either insane luck or cowardice to make it through this world without spilling at least a little blood, he was just a bit more liberal with his choice of targets, he'd met people like Giovanni before, people who thought they could control more than what was in their power. Ideals of grandeur and delusion of control. Menma had snuffed out people like him before, a fledgling organization under the name of 'Team Plasma'. People who were very intent on fucking with the balance of the world beneath a scheme of equality. So he filled their leader Ghetsis with every bullet he had on his person and then went on a shadow crusade to deal with the lieutenants.

His band of savage beasts had helped him all the way, Gengar, who at the time was a Haunter, was able to phase through bases with rapid speed to pinpoint the targets, and Menma in turn was able to fly through with Skarmory's cooperation to rip and tear until only bloody viscera was left.

He hopped off Pidgeot and took a moment to adjust himself, brushing himself off and smoothing out his hair with a narrow stare in the direction he just came. Menma frowned before he ordered, "Search the area for a Charmander, I don't care how frail it may look I'll whip I into shape." Pidgeot nodded, cooing under the caress of her master before hopping off to the side a bit and taking off, Menma produced another ball from his bag, eyes flashing towards the one around his neck.

He produced Skarmory and the pair shared a quiet look at one another, "It'll be quiet out for now. Shall we practice?" Menma asked, Skarmory nodded and awaited its master, Menma placed his bag against a rock, tossing his jacket off and pulling off his singlet.

Chest bare, he twisted a band around on his forearm to show the silver coloured stone, " **Bio-Megavolution!** " Skarmory's form was encased in light as his master too, was encased in light. A stone casing of hardlight shrouded the both of them. The stone shroud exploded and revealed the trainer, encased in silver armour styled in the form of the Skarmory that no longer stood there. The man rolled his shoulders and with a slight flex of a few muscles on his back a pair of metal wing burst from his back.

"Seems stable as ever, that's good. I'd hate to lose this form it's far too useful." He said, the lower half of his face remaining uncovered, the beak-style helmet only falling to his cheekbones, a smile pulled at his lips. "Alright, let's start with some basic warm-ups." Setting into a runners start, Menma shot around the rocky area like a wild silver-red bullet.

He and a Skarmory had symbiotic relationship, due to a few accidents when he was younger Menma's DNA was just loose enough to allow this to happen, and Skarmory had bonded to him so well that the creature was literally able to give his master body and soul out of undying affection.

That's the only way something like this would work, the Megastone itself had mutated upon the first time of its use, Menma had been quite shocked but the pros definitely outweighed any cons. Each time his booted foot struck a stone to bounce off of, it crumbled into rubble, finally it ended with him leaping into the air, body aglow as he spiraled higher and felt the smile grow on his lips, he stayed aloft for a few moments, far off the ground yet completely calm. Two parts of his brain were losing their collective shit as his instincts were being tempered by his reason.

Menma landed and with a flick of his wrist a pair of steel feather shaped blades slipped into his hands, infused with white energy Menma swung them creating whipping gusts of winds that tore shallow trenches in the thick stone of the mountain.

A lot was done with this form before this day, as previously stated he cleansed Team Plasma with it's use, the bullet-proof armour it provided was certainly invaluable. That and the fear of Arceus it put into people was possibly the greatest thing he'd ever seen.

Anyway, Pidgeot was coming back so he landed and tapped the bracelet twice with Skarmory pushing himself against it, in another flash of light the pair separated, Skarmory shook out his feathers and chittered slightly, Menma rubbing his head as the extra consciousness left his thoughts, "We'll pick this up again later, catch'a bud." Skarmory nodded as he was returned, Menma redressed as Pidgeot sat on a stone waiting for her master, he buttoned up his jacket and slipped his bag on before gesturing her down, he jumped on and held on tightly she took off like a rocket and cooed as he began laughing, the adrenaline fueled high from such speed forced him into a good mood.

It was a short flight, but Pidgeot had found what she was hunting, a small orange reptile with a flame on its tail, it was sitting, snoozing peacefully against a few rocks. Menma jumped from her back and landed into a silent crouch, with a flick of his wrist he produced an Ultra Ball, as he had plenty lying about just taking up space so he may as well use them. The creature awoke with a start only to be sucked into the black and gold coloured orb.

The orb pinged without resistance, obviously the creature was weak and/or young still so an Ultra Ball was far outpacing any power to resist it had. Menma picked up the ball and looked around, dawn had broken so there was light and the crisp cool air of morning had set in. Menma was already wired as hell so he couldn't really sleep.

Producing King's ball he released the beast along with the new addition, King nodded in greeting before spying an unfamiliar, and very confused, Charmander. "Time for practice." Said the grinning man, Charmander felt very small as the form of the purple reptilian towered over him.

It was about mid day before Menma let up on the poor critter, King only huffing from the fact he'd been moving about so much.

Hours of vicious combat thrown against it and the little Charmander was thoroughly broken. The creature was huffing in exhaustion as King had given the poor little bastard a work over, Menma watched as the orange lizard shakily got to his feet and gave it a few squirts with Hyper Potion, revitalizing Charmander somewhat.

"Alright, we should be able to head over to Saffron." Menma returned the pair before pulling out Pidgeot's ball, yes Collette would be shitty with him for being in her ball for so long but he wasn't about to have her out when the potential for being caught murdering could happen.

Pidgeot cawed lowly Menma hopped onto her back and ordered her on, "Saffron City." He said, She took to the skies and darted forth, Menma laid his head against her and closed his eyes, not going to into a terribly heavy sleep but he did need a nap.

 **Saffron City**

Being one of the more built up cities in Kanto, Saffron had all the needs of your modern citizen. If said citizen is from Kanto and Johto. Most other countries were just generally more ahead of the times, but enough about that he wasn't here to throw shade at the Kantoites, he was here to play trainer again, the Gym was a rather large building near the centre of town, the large 'GYM' emblazoned in purple on the face of the building a subtle giveaway of its purpose.

Menma hopped off Pidgeot as she nibbled at his hair to rouse him, he swayed slightly before giving her a hug, "Cheers, darling. You can go off and grab something to eat if you want." He ran his hand down her crest a few times before she hopped a few feet and took off. Eager to fatten herself up.

Menma expanded Collette's Ball, before letting her out, the black clad Gardevoir appeared with a hand on her hip. "Care to explain what that was?" She had her arms crossed and was tapping her fingers impatiently, Menma yawned and brushed the sleep from his eyes.

"I removed an obstacle and had to get out of Cerulean before anything happened. I don't want to be spending time in jail again." He summarized with a shrug, walking towards a café to grab something with caffine, Collette trailing disinterestedly.

"I know you hate it, but it was easier for all involved." Menma said, getting a quiet scoff in return, "You were asleep anyway so as far as your concerned you _just_ woke up." The man pointed out, getting a grunt of agreement.

"That's true but it's the principal of the matter, you know how much I hate it in there." Menma had pulled out his gun and a switchblade, carving another notch into the barrel. The people in line didn't even blink twice.

Welcome to Kanto.

After getting coffee and a doughnut for himself and a late for Collette he made his way back to the gym, already expecting a great deal of ease, mostly due to how broken his particular Gengar was.

Menma hit the call button and the sound played, the Leader showed but it wasn't without a good amount of theatrics, Menma rose a brow when a woman in a red suit with a doll on her lap rose from the floor on a throne-like chair, she had long, straight dark green hair and r and sharp, dark blue eyes.

"Do you seek to challenge me?" The woman asked.

"No I just enjoy ringing bells to annoy people." Said Menma withdrawing a ball from his bag, she frowned but didn't bother taking his sarcasm to heart, a screen fell down and registered the combatants, a trio of balls floated and sat in her lap, the first one releasing a Kadabra.

Menma tossed out his own and brought Gengar to the forefront, the Auto-ref called for the battle to begin, "Psychic." Sabrina ordered.

Menma snapped his finger and Gengar vanished from sight, Kadabra looked around with glowing eyes trying to spy the creature, "Night Shade." A phantasm of Gengar appeared, enormous in size, Kadabra stumbled back slightly until the Night Shade fell onto it, washing it in Ghost energy, causing severe damage to Kadabra's delicate Psychic psyche. "Shadow Ball." An orb of black formed and struck Kadabra directly in the chest making it fall onto its back, unconscious.

Now, usually he'd recount these with detail, a little back and forth between himself and the Gym Leader, but Sabrina was such a bore that she really wasn't worth telling anyone about. He won the fight with pretty much the same, bullshit tactic. Gengar got a kick out of it and he got his badge, he left the Psychic gym with a bored sigh, not that he really could have used King, that'd just be suicide for the poor fella.

There was one thing of noteworthiness and that was the fact that apparently the doll could fucking talk, so Menma did the smart thing and got the hell outta there ASAP. He wasn't dealing with some crazy Psychic and her doll. No random subplot for him, no sir.

"Where next?" Collette asked, still rather cross at him.

"Vermillion City, might use the open fields outside of town to train up Charmander a bit before going to the gym, because _that_ was a fucking cakewalk." He said thumbing over his shoulder, Pidgeot descended from the sky, "Shall we?" He asked.

"I suppose." Was the clipped response. Oooh so cold.

She'd get over it, she always did. There were times where he'd rather deal with a slightly annoyed Collette than any other kind of bullshit. Mostly due to the fact that if Col' got too pissy he'd just put her back in the ball and deal with it later.

Cold yes, but he was a little moody what with having stomped out the leader of a criminal organization with such little effort, at least Ghetsis made him work for it.

He hopped onto Pidgeot, Collette sliding in behind him and off they went, once more Menma worked himself into a comfortable position and closed his eyes.

 **Vermillion City; Outskirts.**

Menma was dumped onto the grassy field, sleepily he released Flora, Maganium, King and Charmander. Flora and Meganium looked at the napping trainer and smiled, the smaller of the two picked up their trainer as the Venusaur began making a shelter, pushing up a dense bedding of flowers as Meganium set him down, the pair of grassy reptiles sat with their master.

King picked Charmander up by the scruff of his neck and dragged the smaller critter off to hunt. Collette pilfered Menma's phone and began messing around on the web.

Menma's even breathing and the occasional sigh of content were the only noise aside from the slight tapping of Collette's fingers against this phone for what felt like hours.

It was good to have an off day.

 **End, A little shorter and I'm sorry about that. I'll make the next one longer, I just felt like I owed you guys a chapter for this one. Not that It's not easy to write I just couldn't squeeze much more out of it that wouldn't end up being boring to read.**

 _ **Raxychaz!**_


	7. Chapter 7

**So friends, I've been inspired. By possibly the worst fucking thing I've ever read. My whole body shivered and I CRINGED fam, I fucking cringed. Next level displeasure flowed through my body as I lay in bed derping on my phone.**

 **And thus, inspiration struck me. I will not allow this sight to be overrun by garbage like 'Forgotten Fairy' by Zeroexpo13. No no, don't go and look at it. Please baby I lovers you too much for that. I don't wanna hurt you, just listen and avoid.**

 **Now is this hypocritical of me? Possibly. Subjectively speaking I'm alright at writing. You guys have told me I'm pretty good so that's enough for me. But this fucking garbage, SHALL NOT SHTAND IN MY LAND.**

 **Anyway enjoy your Pokemans.**

 _ **Start!**_

 **Route 6**

"Come on you little shit, react quicker!" Ordered Menma, in Bio-Evolution with Skarmory once more as he rained hell on King, the creature buckling and breaking with each strike the rapidly moving hybrid was landing on him.

Collette was off to the side with Charmander watching, the latter looking mystified by the battle.

A taloned foot swept the bulkier carnivore onto his back, King groaned pitifully as Menma hauled him back up, "C'mon, no breaks until you can hit me in this state." Commanded the possibly apex predator. The mind of a human, and the enhanced body of a disgustingly powerful Steel/Flying type. Sure there were others who could probably top him, himself being one.

Metaphorically speaking, don't worry there's no evil twin bs here kids.

King released a barrage of Poison Stings each of them _plink_ 'd off Menma's armour harmlessly, the creature got so frustrated it just barrled forward like a steam-train, fists and legs aglow, " _Alright, Flurry it is then. King always prefers his right arm, so if I can slip enough grip onto his left I can throw him off balance with his own momentum_." Skarmory's consciousness chirruped at the plan, or internal musing, whatever. The creature was in favour, Menma's body took on the effect of 'Iron Defence' a sheen of green rolling across his form as he slid around the first, right handed strike from King and was idly surprised when the creature went for left kick instead of a punch, no matter.

Backstepping just enough to avoid it the man grabbed the creatures leg and threw it over his shoulder, tossing the great, muscle bound purple reptile a few good feet, and creating a crater on impact. King moaned in pain, Menma pointed a talon towards Charmander, "Get in here." He ordered, the little lizard gulped but got up. Menma flashed over to his pack and tossed out a few more balls, Honchkrow, Helios and Houndoom all came out.

They all surrounded the transformed trainer, King getting back to his feet and Charmander stepping into the ring, "You all know what happens here. The first one to land a strike on me, gets to hunt to the hearts content, all targets. Even trainer Pokemon." Most of them salivated at the idea, their natural predatory streak coming out in full effect, Charmander was slightly suffocated by the hunger in the air, they had all been kept well fed and well loved, but nothing compared to the rush of a good hunt.

If harming their master/friend/companion was part of the requirement, they were fine with that. So long as they didn't put any lasting damage on.

Helios moved first, body swathed in flames, a good ol' Flame Charge to open just as he was taught. Menma dodged to the side only to have to roll into another dodge to avoid a strike from King.

It kept on like this for a while every time one would come, another followed. Pretty simple, not much to really say. Collette was still impressed at the manner her partner flowed about the field of battle he'd set up.

Charmander was staying in the back of the field and shot a flurry of Embers into the fray, Collette watched with morbid fascination as the little orbs of orange fire impacted onto the brawl, all the combatants were struck and as per usual, for some odd reason, the Ember exploded on contact, coating the mess of fisticuffs with smoke. A strong gust of wind later and there stood all of the creatures dogpiled atop their master.

Menma grunted and dug his arms out, propping himself up and staring at Charmander with a blank stare, "You're a cheeky little fucker aintcha?" The Skarmory armoured man drawled. Honchkrow pecked at his helmeted skull, "Oi-oi! Stop it ya fool."

Blindness was a hella of a counter.

Though it did humble him to know that even the smallest things could have a substantial impact.

"Alright, all of you get off me, we're going to whip this little bastard into shape." Standing up abruptly and toppling the tower of Pokemon cracking his knuckles and looming over the small orange lizard. Charmander felt very small all of a sudden and regretted all of his life up to this point.

 **Midday**

Now-Charmeleon was scratching at his ass as a trainer stood across from him, a young man with a Rattata, and shorts.

" _Those are too short. It's bothering me._ " Menma had his head tilted and his eye twitched erratically.

Joey, or whatever his name was, had challenged Menma when he saw the older trainer baiting the junk Pokemon, Pidgeys, Pidgeottos and Spearows, so the youth thought it his duty to stop this foolish slaughter. Charmeleon was looking at the rat with boredom.

"You're gonna get it now bud, my Rattata is super strong, like it's in the top percentage of all Rattata's." If malnourished and twitchy qualified as powerful then crackheads needa take up fighting. Now that would be a treat.

"Right... Sure. Let's just get this over with." Menma drawled hands in his pockets. He was feeling a little lethargic from spending so many hours melded with Skarmory. "Charmeleon, use Fire Fang." Flames began to lick at the orange-red lizards maw as it lunged forward and scooped the purple-white rat off the ground and ripped its head off.

Joey screamed bloody murder at the sight of the bloody murder.

Menma idly kicked at some dirt whilst Charmeleon fed, " _I should come up with a name... He's a fire type. Sol? Yeah that'd work. A great deal quicker than 'Charmeleon'._ " Not to mention Charizard afterwards. The being said Honchkrow, Houndoom and the like didn't have nicknames so that was a slightly hypocritical stance.

What was he doing again?

"Char." Sol was poking at his leg, wiping the blood off his lips, "Char-char."

"Right-right. Let's get goin', Sol." He ordered Collette leaning off the tree she was lazing under, "Lunch?" Menma asked/offered.

"I'd kill for some fish." The Gardevoir answered with a smirk, Menma mirrored the expression.

"Then off we go."

 **Pewter City Gym**

" _Well at least it's a Water Type._ " Brock thought, this time Ash had come back with a Poliwag. The damage the little creature could put out was quite impressive, and honestly at this point he was just sick of it. So drummed up an extra two Geodudes and threw three of them Ash's way. The kid won, and after getting his badge Brock sent him on his way.

"Phew, thank goodness... If I had to battle him one more time I was going to pull my own hair out." Lamented Brock, Rhyhorn sidled up next to him and lazed onto the ground. "I know right? My brains fried from his voice. I'll be hearing that in my nightmares for years now." Brock shivered at the phantom pains that Ash's voice gave his ears.

"Rhy~." Groaned the big, rock creature.

"I know buddy." Brock agreed, pulling out his phone and calling up Cerulean City, he waited for a few moments until a familiar voice picked up.

"Hello, Misty speaking." Oh no, a girl. Brock was terrible at speaking with women over the phone, why did he call in the first place?! You can't take their hands and confess undying love unless you're there in person!

"Uh, hi this is Brock from Pewter Gym... I just wanted to uh, tell you that Ash finally got passed so you'll uh... be dealing with that... soon." He finished lamely.

"Oh. Well thanks for the heads up Brock. Hehe, I'll try to compose myself." For how poorly worded the guys words were Misty could appreciate the jest, "I'll speak with you later, someone just came in for a challenge."

"Uh, yeah! Sure, bye Misty." He hung up and looked to Rhyhorn who was shaking his head, "I think that went well." He saw awkwardly, and then began calling another person, this time the very man who gave him a new companion.

A few buzzes and he got through, "Menma speaking."

"Guess who finally got past me?" Asked Brock with a smile audible in his voice. Speaking to a fellow bro was so much easier than speaking to girls.

"Holy shit, wait he's been stuck there for like what... a week or so now? I am so sorry." Came Menma's voice, having seen the boy in the city. "I'm just amazed he even managed it. How long did he stick to the rat?"

"Up until about yesterday. From what I can gather Ash went to one of the rivers in the forest and caught a Poliwag, probably spent the afternoon training with it." Informed Brock.

" _What's going on?_ " Asked a voice in the background.

"Apparently it took that Ash kid, you know the one with the Pikachu? Yeah him, took it like a week to beat Brock." Shared Menma, Brock guessed it was the Gardevoir he was with last time the older male was there.

" _What a fucking looser_." Oh snappy.

"Indeed. Anything else interesting happen on your end, Brock? How's Rhyhorn?" Menma asked, the muffled sound of food being eaten barely managing to get into the speaker of the phone.

"Not much and he's been doing really well, my siblings love him. Did I interrupt your lunch or something?" Brock asked, not wanting to intrude on his friendly acquaintance's lunch time.

"Not really, I'm just finishing up. Though from the sounds of it you should get something to eat man, the quaver in your voice isn't super great. I'll talk to you again man, catcha." Brock felt a smile crawl up onto his face, he was kinda hungry now that he thought about it.

 **Vermillion City Gym: A Few Hours Later.**

"So, you're here to challenge me, eh? You ain't nothin' but a baby. Why should I bother?" Large, blonde and tank-top. That's how you describe Lt. Surge.

"I'm... not even going to bother with that. You have to because it's your job, _Mr._ Surge." Sniped Menma, Lt. of what army? The war was over a hundred years ago. No continents kept a military presence in any capacity. Probably why organizations like Rocket could exist, in hindsight.

"Feh, fine. Get ready for a pumelin' baby, my Raichu's gonna mop the floor with that prissy little dame." Surge swore as the chubby rat took centre stage in the arena, one of Surge's cucks got onto the sideline and spouted off the usual terms of combat, Collette scoffed and flipped her hair.

"I don't do battle, darling. I'm above it." Informed the Psychic type with derision, Surge's eyebrows lifted but his eyes were drawn elsewhere as a large purple reptilian appeared from its ball.

" _What's wrong with that Nidoking!? It's looks freakin' feral!_ " Now this worried Surge slightly. As the plump, slow form of his Raichu compared little to the muscle bound, ferocious looking Nidoking.

"Begin!" Said the cuck.

"King, Dig." Like a large purple drill King burrowed underground leaving a large gaping hole in the floor. Whilst he was in the process of teaching King how to use Earthquake/Magnitude, Dig served his purpose more at the moment.

"Raichu, get ready for a t'under bolt." Oh god please, just stop. Menma physically cringed at the man's mannerisms, something about them just grated on his very soul.

"King, surface and go into Flurry." A large purple horn to the chest tossed the chubby rat into the air, King's savage form followed anon and with a powerful fist he pummeled the Raichu back and sent it into the ground with enough force to cave it's ribcage in, and create a decently wide crater.

Raichu began to attempt to breath, thought it came out as strangled, and wet with blood. Surge was horrified, returning the creature with haste. He pulled something from his pocket and tossed it at the challenger, Menma caught it and looked it over in his palm, a small sunflower-shaped badge, "Are you telling me you run this gym without using more than one Pokemon?"

"Get out!" Roared Surge, Menma narrowed his eyes.

"Listen here mother fucker you bring out another Pokemon and do your damn job this second or so help me I will get you fired. You're a Gym Leader, fuckin' act like it!" Snarled the man, Surge's nostrils flared as he rumbled angrily.

"Get. Out."

"You giant bitch." Groused Menma as he returned an angry King, Collette coming over to his side, "Expect to get your ass chewed out by the league. This is just pathetic." Surge felt his already paper thin patience break, the bulky man raced towards the younger male with the intent to break his face.

Menma took the hit head on without flinching, his cheek redening with a dark look in his eyes he fished his revolver from his bag and placed it against the man thigh, Surge's eyes widened as the younger male shot him in the leg, pain bloomed like an explosion. Menma leant forward and whispered in the mans ear.

"Don't try it, boy. You'll lose."

 **End.**

 **Next time, Fuchsia City and the Safari Zone.**

 **If you liked it, lemme know. If you didn't like it, try not to be a salty salamander. If you wanna have vicious hate-sex with someone... try to hold it in. It's probably for the best.**

 _ **Raxychaz!**_


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